Who art thou?

Good Morning friends,

Today I woke up thinking about who I am.

I think of the bright eyes, clear skinned, curvy body girl I was at 18, and I think we often feel like that is the person we need to be forever.

You hear people say, "I wish I was the weight I was in high school." or "Wow, you were so pretty" when looking at a picture of your younger self.

"I wish I could go back to high school" I never understood that one. 

Yes, I wouldn't mind the energy I had at that age, but would I really want to be that stupid?

I mean were we ever able to make a right decision? I have no idea how. I made a ton that year. I chose a college, a career, graduated, chose a husband, planned a wedding, started a family, chose not to go to college, got very sick, and life went on from there.

When my daughter was 18, she wasn't even wearing matching socks, much less deciding a life plan.

So we know we can never go back and be that person, but we have to know that decisions that young stupid girl made are ones that this 43 year old has to handle. You cannot go back, nor would I want to ever. But I do miss those curves, great hair, clear skin. 

I often think  I had no idea what I was doing or deciding it had to be ALL God, cause if any of it was me I would have messed it up royally. This guy who looked good in his Gibeau Jeans and converse, in reality was a Star trek watching nerd who I love so much. I also have to live with those decisions. Sometimes it is not so easy, but thank God for grace. Now I need to figure out just who this person is. If anything in this past year has taught me, I am NOT that girl anymore. So that leads me to ask "Who am I?"

Now that is journey I now know I need to go on, so where to start? first step.

My name Suszi. it is a creation of my own design. I hated my name Sue Ryan, so plain and boring. So I created this one. I love it, it is who I am. Unique. 

And today that is all I can deal with hehehe.

Tomorrow, is another day, my puny brain can only do so much.

So have a blessed day and stay warm.

school is out early so Yipee snow day

Always

Suszi