Fears of failure as a parent

Good Morning dear mothers and friends,

I love this top post card

 "Hey lets let the children ride with giant dangerous animals that can eat them!"

Today on the way home from taking Ian to school, it really hit me how large the fear I have,

I'm not prone to fear but there is one thing that I think I am constantly afraid of.

And that is forgetting something my kids need. Not a fear like meeting their needs like food or normal living stuff, but stuff like it is a special day at school and I wasn't paying attention to the notes that came home so I sent you in clothes when it was PJ day kinda fear. Today was ride your bike to school day, and Ian didn't want to ride because it is kinda rainy here, but I am always fearful of forgetting the things that are important to him. ie. the birthday party fail last week. 

I think the fear comes from my mom forgetting or not being informed about what I needed, and I went to school at least 30 minutes from home anywhere we lived, because I went to private school. So there were many times I didn't have proper shoes for a basketball game or cold lunch for a field trip, the wrong clothes on special dress up days. My mother was wonderful and amazing but Not a morning person. Therefore prone to not thinking that early. I'm not really sure why I have this fear because I try to be vigilant in paying attention, BUT I am not organized and sometimes miss things in the craziness that our life is. I am not afraid of disappointing my kids as far as getting a new toy, or joining the best team, or enrolling them in sports or activities like dance or swim lessons when we can't afford it just to be like the Jones. But it is just a little nagging fear that I won't be the best mom or that  I will disappoint them as a mother. AND I do . AND I will. And I know there is no perfection as a parent, but just a lot of guessing and hoping they won't be damaged beyond repair as adults, due to my crappy parenting skills. I thank God that He did equip me with a love for children and a desire to have them and for giving me the ones He did. Even if at this moment my Chrissy won't stop making clicking noises with her tongue so I can write this and it is making me crazy, because I have told her at least 10 times to stop in the last 15 minutes. BLAHHHHHH.

Ok so now the yelling and crying  has begun. Another day in paradise at the Grudem home. Some days there is just not enough medication to get through mornings like this. And I am sure as time goes on and she regresses more and more it will get worse but I pray for patience and more patience and more patience so I can make through just a few more minutes today. 

So hug your kids today even if you don't like them much.

And be the best parent you can, despite your fears and frustrations.

Have a happy and joyous day.

Suszi